March 7, 2008
-
Postage
I received a letter from the insurance company yesterday explaining why I'm teetering on the edge of death and a terrible risk - I might have experienced depression between August of 06 and now. Apparently they're qualified to judge my psychological wellbeing based on the meds I'm taking. For their info, I've never been happier or healthier (in recent memory). I've also never been diagnosed with depression so their bias based on possibility is frustrating. I could die some time between now and 2064 (I'll be 80) but I'm sure that life insurance companies would insure me - the risk is really low.
All of this illustrates a major frustration of mine - a complete lack of understanding on the part of America as to what a mental health diagnosis truly means. If you are reading this, please SWEAR you will never say to someone suffering from depression "just snap out of it" - those words will summon me from wherever I am and I will punch through your head. Do you really want a skinny, naked guy in a shower-cap punching a hole in your head? It might make a good party trick but you'll only perform it once - and then I'll need to figure out how I'm getting back to my apartment without any pants. And as usual, I'm off topic. There's so much bias against people suffering from something involving their mind and I hate it. Let's treat people who feel like crap like they're less than human - this will make them feel better.
If you've seen a psychiatrist you're dangerous. If you take antidepressants you're treading the fine line between functionality and murderous rampage. If you feel anything but happy you're broken freak. I hate the emphasis on "happy" and "feeling good" in this country - it's okay to feel pain. A publisher actually shot down my first book not because it was poorly written, they thought I had something good, but because it wasn't happy enough. Is your life sunshine and fairy giggles? Is it bombs or butterflies that fly through Bagdad? Sometimes it's the juxtaposition of light and darkness that makes light so beautiful - and vice versa. The "love" stories I find most appealing/relatable are the ones that are bittersweet and more in tune with reality - people are flawed and so is the expression of their love.
I got a haircut on Wednesday - my hair is short and spiky now. I can easily pass for a high schooler again - and I did. And by "I did" I mean I got carded for buying a video game with an M rating - you only need to be 17 to purchase that. Someday I'll "lookalikaman" and Miss Swan will appear to announce that fact - or maybe I'll just do an impression and be satisfied with that. I'd have a picture of my hair but I failed to remember to borrow my sister's camera again.
Speaking of my sister, she swung by the other day - it was good to have some company. My ice cream and Denny's crew has been scattered to the winds by fate (stupid growing up...meany aging process grumble grumble) so I rarely have visitors or a social life in general - which as of late has been to my liking.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x-OqKWXirsU
http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2008/02/27
http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2008/02/20
Taste the madness - mmm, just like mom used to make!
Comments (9)
Just snap out of it! :duck:: Hehehe i couldn't help it! I mean um it was an accident. I'm normal, everyone else is messed-up. Waving at sis
Your blogs are always entertaining. I just wanted you to know that I read them, even if I don't always comment.
@qccan - I don't punch snakes.
@Viewtiful_Justin - thanks, Justin! Hopefully I'll continue to entertain
Yeah, I'm pretty sure if anyone ever told me to snap out of it I would beat them. Then beat them again. Then I'd let you at them.
@logicalemu - that's assuming we could snap out of our depression long enough to beat them. Of course, I've found that blinding rage is an excellent anti-depressive stimulant
@JJ_Ames - My depression often manifests as hard-to-control anger. I'd have no problem beating the living shit out of them. Beating on someone or something is surprisingly good at diffusing anger.
"Just snap out of it!" is as offensive as telling a girl with anorexia, "Just eat a hamburger already!" Depression -- and anorexia -- are caused by physical reactions to chemicals in the brain, not just "having a bad day" or "feeling a little bit chunky."
I am soooo right with you on this one. Two very important people in my life suffer from depression, and one also has fibromaylgia -- a disease triggered by stress that causes extreme and unexplainable pain in the extremities, with no physical cause. So she gets depressed, the depression causes her pain, which she sees a doctor for. The doctor finds no cause and sends her home, which causes her more stress, which inflicts more pain... I'm sure you know where this cycle goes. If she could "just snap out of it", she would have done so 10 years ago and saved thousands of dollars in medical bills that her insurance wouldn't pay for because -- surprise -- there's no medical reason for it.
Amen to your "not happy enough?" section. My fictional worlds are like dark chocolate. Dark and bittersweet, and that's the way I like it.
S-so-ci-al li-lif-fe. This sounds sounds familiar... Possibly something I have lost as part of my temporary exile. What fleeting social life = roommate + friend + me + friend's tv. It's rather pathetic when I realize that my social life is the same people doing remotely the same thing week after week.
Comments are closed.