July 13, 2010
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I could beat you up in my sleep
I have a lot of violent dreams. I think this reflects my discomfort with responsibilities I don't want but can't be rid of. In the dreams, I am confronted by those that would harm me with little or no justification. I avoid them until cornered and then I lash out.
It reflects my personality. I'm generally easygoing so I'll put up with a lot of abuse and stress. If someone manages to push me long enough or jumps straight to threatening me, I dig in my heels and set my jaw. I will get along with difficult people even when we strongly disagree on a subject. If they refuse to get along or leave alone I won't roll over. I will put up with more if it is directed at me and less if it is directed at others. I hate it when people abuse each other.
I almost smashed my alarm clock today. I was dreaming that I was being attacked and I'd managed to dodge an attack causing my attacker to overextend himself. I took advantage of that vulnerable position, grabbed his head, and smashed it into a brick wall - only the "head" was my clock and the "brick wall" was my thin wall. Fortunately, the cord dragged and I was smashing downward so it mostly nudged the wall. I gave the alarm a good smack though.
Originally these dreams caused me to throw a punch. I've bloodied my knuckles a few times - we had an exposed, brick wall in our dorms. I moved on to kneeing and/or kicking - a few bruising and a stubbed toe. I can't wait till I'm "tearing out throats" and wake to a disemboweled pillow. Maybe I'll headbutt the wall.
Maybe I'm just a psychopath conveniently packaged in a weak, docile frame. Somehow I still manage to intimidate people (in person). I've been told I look "serious" and/or "brooding."
Little do they know I'm texting my best friend about unicorn giggles and how much I love animals and frolicking. OR the time I told her that I was surrounded by squirrels, chirping birds, and butterflies and texted "I'm a magical Disney princess - tee-hee!"
Oh yes, I'm terribly dark and brooding.
Freaking mosquitos are everywhere. Even remaining in my house hasn't kept me safe. I've got half a dozen bites while inside.
I need another 20k in XP to reach level 6 and each Kobold I kill is only worth 7xp - which is split amongst 6 party members. Maybe I'll herd a bunch of them into a corner and cast "fireball" into their center...several hundred times...
Comments (10)
The putting up with a lot of abuse until someone jumps straight at you sounds like me. People who pry and push and keep doing it even after you deny them what they want aggravate me.
http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/05/sneaky-hate-spiral.html
So, so true, for me anyway.
I often wake myself by screaming, laughing, running. Stress does it to me. Fortunately, I haven't thrown punches or kicks. That could be a big problem for my husband.
@GermanWrench - oh my gosh, thank you. i just bookmarked that blog under my favorites. she is hilarious.
i have never ONCE saw you and thought "serious" or "brooding." i think the worst i've seen you is extremely frustrated, but not for long. usually you just appear to be simply concentrating or else, a goofball. not that you're never serious or brooding. it's just that i have been afraid to approach a lot of people in my life, but never you.
then again...in my first glances at you, you were always smiling, and before i really knew you, i your hilarious blog (at the time, mostly silly posts), so maybe i never had the chance to be terrified of you, lol.
*was reading your hilarious blog
five comments ftw!!!!!
@eowynnabeeowyn - usually I'm lucky to get one!
@GermanWrench - you're back! Hurray!